What I Love About Thanksgiving

Posted on November 25, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

Ever since I was little, Thanksgiving has been my favorite holiday. My mom was usually the one to host the festivities, and every year she would make it special. While I didn’t really help much with preparing the meal, I was in charge of setting the table and making the place cards and would make sure to decorate each one with the appropriate Thanksgiving flair (i.e. turkeys, pilgrims, and various fall leaves).

What always amazed me about the Thanksgiving meal was how seamlessly my mom would pull it off, or at least how seamlessly she made it appear! No doubt she has had a lot of practice doing this over the years, and I’m sure her first few attempts were filled with errors of timing and, perhaps, trying too hard. But by the time I was old enough to understand, I came to see my mom as a culinary genius.

I firmly believe that my mom’s real expertise was in editing herself. She always focused on a few staple dishes every year and never made too much food. Unlike some Thanksgivings I’ve heard about, there were never three kinds of mashed potatoes, obscene amounts of bread or endless desserts. She kept it simple – salad for starter, turkey with stuffing, sweet potato casserole, two kinds of homemade cranberry sauce, cranberry bread and usually steamed green beans for the main meal. Dessert usually consisted of a couple of baked goods, like brownies made from scratch and maybe some pecan pie with Brigham’s vanilla ice cream. Lots of food, to be sure, but it never felt like too much.

Aside from the food, I really enjoy the family togetherness of it all. My siblings don’t live locally, so the holidays are usually the only times I get to catch up with them and their kids. Some of my fondest memories are those in which we would gather together after the meal to hang out in the den either watching sports on TV or playing a friendly game of Trivial Pursuit. My father passed away from dementia 2 years ago, and one of the last really good memories I have with him was the last Thanksgiving he spent in our home. All of us gathered in his bedroom to spend some time with him before the meal. Even though he struggled to communicate at that time, I am hopeful that it was a special Thanksgiving for him, too.

A lot of my patients who struggle with eating disorders have a difficult time with Thanksgiving, as it can feel like a very food-centered holiday. I can definitely understand where they are coming from, as it must be difficult to be surrounded by delicious food when sometimes food feels like the enemy. What I try to remind all my patients is that Thanksgiving is only one day. Try not to be too hard on yourself if you eat a bit more than you usually do. And if there is a particular dish that you absolutely love and don’t get to eat it often, give yourself permission to enjoy it. Life is too short to not enjoy the delicious food and heart-warming company of the holiday. I hope all of you are able to relax, spend some quality time with your family and friends and savor the day.

Snack Ideas

Posted on November 12, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

Lately it seems like almost all of my patients have been asking for snack ideas. In general, I have a few guidelines regarding snacks. First would be timing. Is the snack in question something that you just need to help you bridge a short gap between breakfast and lunch? Or is it something that will need to hold you over for several hours? Perhaps it is heading into “mini meal” territory, for those days when a sit down meal just isn’t going to cut it.

Of course, if it’s just a small snack to keep you from being ravenous for lunch or dinner, I would suggest picking a carbohydrate and then having it with a protein or a fat. What does that look like? An apple (carb) with a piece of cheddar cheese (pro/fat), pretzels (carb) with hummus (pro/fat), or a handful of trail mix made with nuts (pro/fat) and dried fruit (carb) are all great examples. Basically, the combination of carbohydrate and fat/protein is the best way to fuel your body between meals as it gives you some quick energy (carbs) and some energy that will satisfy you and keep your blood sugar levels steady (fats/proteins).

If a bigger snack is in order, I would recommend having at least a protein, a carbohydrate AND a fat. That could look like a peanut butter and banana sandwich; a homemade pizza bagel made with ½ a bagel, tomato sauce, some shredded mozzarella and perhaps a few slices of pepperoni; or a bowl of oatmeal with a tablespoon of peanut butter and a sliced banana. The main purpose of the bigger snack is to bridge a larger gap between meals while also making sure you will be hungry for the following meal.

Even if a patient knows that she is hungry for a snack, sometimes figuring out what exactly she is hungry for can be a challenge. In this instance, I would suggest going through a quick list of food qualities to help narrow it down. Am I hungry for something hot or cold or room temperature? Do I want something creamy and soft? Crunchy or hard? Am I in the mood for something savory or sweet or perhaps a mix of the two? Do I want something spicy? Salty? Bland? Sour? Am I hungry for something cheesy? Meaty? Chocolate-y? It may feel a little silly to go through a list like this, but sometimes it can just take a minute or two to figure out what will really hit the spot.

Some more snack ideas:

-cut up vegetables with ranch or bleu cheese dressing

-turkey slices with cheese and some crackers

-pretzels with peanut butter

-animal crackers with Nutella

-yogurt with granola and/or fruit

-1/2 of a turkey or roast beef sandwich

-tortilla chips with guacamole

-hardboiled egg and a piece of fruit

Something is better than “all or nothing”

Posted on October 23, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

Lately it seems like I have a number of patients who are struggling. Whether it’s sticking to their prescribed meal plan, trying to incorporate more fruits or veggies into their diet or eating more intuitively, many of them are just finding themselves at a loss. When they are stressed out due to life’s challenges, they revert to their old ways of coping. For some that might mean restricting their intake and counting calories obsessively, for others that might mean zoning out on the couch watching TV with a bag of chips. Oftentimes I will hear the same reasoning: “I just couldn’t do [healthy habit] this week; it felt like too much effort.”

When we dig deeper, I often find that many of my patients have an “all or nothing” mindset about their eating. Either they are 100% committed to making healthy eating choices or they throw their hands up and say “screw it!” It might look something like this: a patient who has stated a goal that she only wants to eat out at restaurants twice per week found herself overworked and stressed and ended up eating out five times during that week. Or perhaps someone has set a goal of meal planning and grocery shopping every Sunday, but he just never gets around to it.

A lot of the time, these patients will come in to our appointment with their heads held low and feeling like failures. This isn’t the case! I look at these “failures” as data that we can use to help us in the future. Maybe the goals that were set were too much for that person at the time. Or perhaps there is another area of change that we should focus on. The best thing we can do in our session is to rework the goals that aren’t being met. Sometimes that means making these goals a bit more achievable (e.g. aiming for eating out 4 or fewer times per week for someone who is used to eating out 5 or more times per week).

The other idea I think is important is the “good enough,” concept. No one is perfect and similarly, when we expect ourselves to never fail, we are setting ourselves up for failure. Sometimes achieving parts of our goals is better than totally giving up completely. For instance, let’s say someone is really struggling with eating healthy lunches during the week. She is buried under paperwork and totally overextended at work and has been just grabbing a bag of chips from the vending machine. Ideally, she’d like to be packing her home-cooked lunches the night before and bringing them with her to work every day. But, it just isn’t happening. How about working on a middle ground solution? That could be bringing frozen meals for lunch instead of either buying potato chips or bringing home-cooked lunches. Are frozen meals ideal? No. But are they “good enough,” i.e. better than nothing? Absolutely!

The above example might feel uncomfortable for many people. Oftentimes, a patient will come into our session feeling like they have been “bad” because she didn’t achieve the goals we set last session 100%. What I say to that is: 1) maybe we didn’t set the right goal and 2) all you can do is the best you can do in that moment. Even if you don’t fully reach all of your goals, try to ease up on yourself a bit and realize that you are human. Something is always better than “all or nothing.”

Physical Activity: So Much More Than Burning Calories

Posted on July 8, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

“Just finished a seven-mile run – definitely earned the right to splurge at the party tonight!”

“I play tennis six times per week to keep my weight in check and to be able to eat what I want.”

“Just gorged at my friend’s Fourth of July cookout – looks like I will need to hit the gym extra hard to burn all those calories off!”

The above are just some of the comments I have either seen posted on Facebook or heard in conversation over the past few weeks. While these types of comments are quite common and universally agreed upon, I have a problem with them for a few reasons.

There is an abundance of evidence that exercise improves one’s health. It not only has been proven to improve blood pressure, blood lipid profiles, inflammation, and heart health in general, it has also been found to help the processing of glucose and insulin as well. But despite all of these positive findings, there is very little scientific evidence that exercise is an effective way to control weight and that exercise by itself does not have as much of an impact on our metabolism as most people think it does.

In one study, a group of volunteers from a hunting and gathering tribe in Tanzania were studied to see if there was a link between their activity levels and the number of calories they burned in a day. While it was true that the tribe members were much more active than the average American, walking about 7 miles per day on average, their metabolic rates were about the same as the average metabolic rate for Westerners. That means that despite the fact that the tribe members were doing significantly more physical activity than Westerners, they were burning the same number of calories as Westerners. Their increased activity did not mean they burned more calories.

Aside from the problematic idea about using exercise as a weight control mechanism, the bigger problem I have is the common belief that exercise’s only benefit is to burn calories. I know so many people who run regularly, not because they love to run, but rather because they are repenting for their dietary “sins.” Whatever happened to being physically active because we enjoy the way it makes us feel? Whatever happened to playing a friendly game of pick-up basketball for the sheer fun of it? Or jumping into the pool on a hot summer day to cool off and splash around? So many of us view exercise as a way to punish our bodies into submission rather than as a way to feel more alive and appreciate what our bodies can do.

How about we start using physical activity as a way to connect with our bodies and enjoy what they can do for us? How about engaging in exercise as a way to improve our health and help our bodies to function at their best? Or taking up a sport for the thrill of the game? The benefits of physical activity are so much more than simply burning off last night’s nachos. And no one needs to “earn” the right to eat what he or she wants. That is no way to live life.

Noms: Farm Grill, Newton

Posted on May 21, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

While we enjoy trying new restaurants often, there are a handful of restaurants that are our favorites, and as such, we go to them frequently. One of these establishments is Farm Grill and Rotisserie in Newton. This rather unassuming eatery at 40 Needham Street serves some of the freshest and tastiest Greek cuisine we have ever tasted.

The Farm Grill is a no-frills establishment; you order your food up at the counter, and then they call out your number when your order is ready. While the extensive menu takes up nearly the entire wall and is somewhat overwhelming, it is broken down into categories, including Salads, Appetizers, and Dinners to make it more manageable. The prices are reasonable, with most salads averaging around $10 and most entrees ranging from $14-$18; and with the generous portions and quality ingredients, it actually feels like a steal.

Farm Grill has an impressive selection of appetizers, including traditional grape leaves, spicy feta spread, and hummus, but Jonah and Joanne are crazy for the tzatziki, a savory spread made with Greek yogurt, cucumbers, garlic and herbs. This deliciously creamy delight is best eaten with an order of grilled gyro pita rather than the typical pita they serve on the side, as the gyro pita is thicker and fluffier and a more substantial vehicle for the spread.

While the menu boasts Greek staples such as Moussaka (an eggplant, potato and beef dish), Spanakopita (filo dough stuffed with feta and spinach), and Pastitzio (a pasta and beef casserole), the real must-haves are the grilled offerings, especially the chicken kabob. The kabob, consisting of juicy bites of marinated chicken, sliced peppers and onions, is grilled to perfection. Jonah and Joanne are always amazed at how juicy and flavorful the chicken is and, of course, how well it goes with tzatziki! Typically, Joanne and Jonah will each get a chicken kabob on top of a large Greek salad served with a side of homemade creamy Greek dressing. On occasion, they will each order the chicken kabob meal, which comes with a small side salad and two hot sides of your choice, including (but not limited to) spinach and rice pilaf, steamed vegetables, and butternut squash puree. No matter what permutation you get, you will leave Farm Grill feeling satisfied and nourished.

This restaurant is a special place where many of the customers are regulars and are treated like family. For as long as it keeps putting out high quality, addictively yummy cuisine, it will continue to be one of our go-to places for a great meal.

Noms: Margarita’s, Framingham

Posted on April 17, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

One of our favorite cuisines is Mexican food. In fact, we had our engagement party at a favorite Mexican restaurant. That place has since closed, so we have been on the lookout for a new favorite Mexican spot. Recently, we decided to give Margarita’s Mexican Restaurant in Framingham a try. Margarita’s is a chain with 24 locations throughout the Northeast.

When we walked in at 5:30pm on a Saturday, the place was already packed, which was surprising. While we waited for a table, we had a chance to peruse the lengthy menu, which was divided into numerous sections, including appetizers, salads, vegetarian dishes, fajitas, tacos, grill and “Los Favoritos.” Needless to say, the number of menu options was overwhelming. In the end, we opted to share the appetizer of guacamole with tortilla chips. Jonah got the “Burrito Vegetariana” (aka vegetarian burrito), and Joanne ordered the shrimp fajitas.

The meal started off well, as our waiter was prompt and courteous. We were given a complimentary basket of tortilla chips with salsa, which was deliciously salty and spicy, and our drinks were brought quickly and refilled as needed. We were pleasantly surprised by the guacamole appetizer, as it tasted freshly made and authentic.

After that, the meal took a turn for the worse. While Jonah was excitedly expecting the variety of vegetables promised in his burrito, he was sorely disappointed by the lack of peppers, mushrooms, black beans, and rice, and completely overwhelmed by the sheer abundance of under-sautéed onion in and on top of the burrito. Jonah likened his experience to “pulling a raw onion straight out of the ground and eating it like an apple,” and, unfortunately, his breath smelled like onion for the rest of the weekend.

While the shrimp in Joanne’s fajitas were perfectly cooked and the presentation was impressive, she was put off by the overly-salty seasoning used on the fajita vegetables (again, an overabundance of onion) and felt like the veggies were undercooked. The fajita platter did not come out of the kitchen sizzling on a cast iron skillet like most fajita platters do; instead, the food looked like it had been sautéed and then placed on a cast iron skillet afterwards. All in all, it was a disappointing entrée.

To top it all off, the meal ended up being more than $40 for just the two of us, which seemed unreasonably high for the quality and quantity of the food. Thus, we will continue our search for our new favorite Mexican restaurant. If any of you have suggestions, we’d love to hear them!

What Not to Say to Someone With an Eating Disorder

Posted on February 26, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

It’s National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, so to stay with that theme, I thought it might be worthwhile to write about one of the most common questions I get from parents of my eating disorder (ED) patients: “What should I not say to my daughter/son who has an active ED?” Working with hundreds of ED patients and their families, I have compiled a list of “what not to say to or around your loved one who is struggling with an ED.” Here are three comments that could be triggering to your loved one.

1) “You look so healthy! How could you possibly have an ED?”

On the surface, this seems to be an innocuous and even positive comment. But, all the ED patient hears is: “You don’t look emaciated enough to have an ED. So therefore, you are fat.” Clearly, this is not what the speaker intended, but someone with an ED has a very distorted view of themselves and how others perceive him or her. It’s important to remember that people with EDs come in all shapes and sizes and it really isn’t possible to determine the severity of someone’s ED just by looking at him or her.

2) “I can’t believe how fat I’ve gotten! That’s it, no more carbs ‘til Christmas!”

I can’t tell you how many times my patients tell me that one of their parents has uttered the above. A parent might think that since the comment is about himself or herself, it shouldn’t be triggering to the child. This is incorrect. Kids learn by example and if they hear you talk badly about yourself and be critical of your body, they will think it’s okay for them to talk badly about themselves and criticize their bodies. This just fuels the ED even more.

3) “I know she needs to gain weight to be healthy. But we don’t want her to gain too much weight, right?”

Yes, I have heard these words from a number of parents and in front of their kid, no less. Weight gain is often a requirement in the recovery for anorexia nervosa. But weight isn’t the only factor that needs to be measured. Vital signs such as heart rate and blood pressure both lying down and standing up are very important indicators of health. Other measures of health include blood tests to look at nutrition status, whether or not a menstruating female has lost their period, and bone density. EDs take a toll on the entire body, not just weight. By keeping the focus on weight, we are fueling the idea that weight is the end all and be all. This is just not true.

Obviously, none of the above comments are meant to be malicious – we all want the best for our loved ones. But, it’s important to think about how your comment might be perceived by your son/daughter/sister/friend. We can’t edit ourselves every minute of every day, but by being aware of your words, you could spare your loved one (and yourself) a lot of unnecessary grief.

Noms: Finale, Boston

Posted on February 18, 2014 by Joanne Soolman

To keep with our chocolate-themed newsletter, we thought it would be fun to review one of our favorite dessert restaurants, Finale. We had our very first date at the Finale in Coolidge Corner (which sadly is no longer), so the restaurant holds a special place in our hearts. Despite the closing of the Coolidge Corner location, we love going to the Back Bay Finale to celebrate special occasions or when we are in the mood for a fancy dessert.

One might assume that Finale only serves dessert, but one would be incorrect about this assumption! In addition to its myriad sweets, Finale has a rather impressive, although abbreviated, “Savory Menu” as well. All savory items are less than $16, which is a pretty good deal any way you slice it. Joanne has been to the Harvard Square location several times for lunch, and she very much enjoys the Greek salad topped with roasted chicken, especially appreciating the unexpected mango and candied olives. Another tasty savory meal is the truffle macaroni and cheese, which is very rich, warm and comforting on a cold winter’s day.

Obviously, desserts are the stars of the show at Finale, and ranging from $9-12, they are a good deal, given the quality of the ingredients and the beautiful presentation on the plate. On our first date, Jonah got the crème brulee, which had a perfect crispy crust on top of a creamy sweet custard and was garnished with fresh fruit. Joanne got the Manjari Mousse, which is a “bittersweet Valrhona Manjari chocolate mousse layered with chocolate buttermilk cake.” While the cake and mousse on their own are divine, make sure to ask your server for extra crème anglaise and French apricot puree, as those two sauces put this dessert over the top!

The last few times we have gone to Finale, we opted for the dessert sampler under the “Shareable Desserts” section of the menu, which allows you to try up to nine miniature-sized versions of Finale’s signature desserts. These little bites let you experience everything without bursting your wallet (or your stomach!). While the shareable desserts are a bit pricier at $17-27, they can be a more economical way to enjoy your sweets with a group of friends.

If you are hankering for a sweet way to end the evening, you should definitely make a special trip to Finale. Sweet dreams!

The Wrong Idea

Posted on December 30, 2013 by Joanne Soolman

In addition to the many patients I see for eating disorders, I often have individuals come to see me for help with weight loss. This goal is completely understandable in the current context of our society. Most of us have been told by numerous sources that weight loss is essential for health, and only if we are at the “right” weight will we live long and healthy lives. And up until about five years ago, I would have agreed with this assumption.

But, as I have written about in many other blogs, I’ve had a paradigm shift. There is more and more scientific evidence out there that weight and health are not inextricably linked. In fact, it is completely feasible for someone to weigh considerably more than the BMI and weight charts tell her to and to be perfectly healthy. In contrast, I have seen countless patients in my office who are at their “ideal” weights, yet are using extremely unhealthy measures to stay there and have numerous health issues as a result.

Therefore, I am concerned when the New Year comes around, as I know that our office will become busier than ever with people wanting to lose weight. I’m afraid that prospective patients will have the wrong idea about what I will and will not do. As a registered dietitian, I am knowledgeable about nutrition for health promotion. This means I can provide nutrition education for my patients and help them figure out ways to establish some healthier eating habits. While these healthier eating habits may lead to some weight loss, weight loss will not be the inherent goal of our work together. If any weight loss occurs, it is just the byproduct of the lifestyle changes one instills. It isn’t the primary goal.

Maybe 2014 will be the year that we can all start taking our eyes off of the scale and instead focusing on making healthy lifestyle changes instead.

Be Your Own Best Friend

Posted on December 18, 2013 by Joanne Soolman

It’s the holiday season, a time to spread joy and love to those around you. Many times this takes place in the form of buying gifts, baking, and cooking for those we care about. It often involves telling our friends and family how much they mean to us, how loved they are. This is the time of the year when we show our appreciation and care for others.

So, in the midst of spreading all of this happiness to others, who often gets neglected? You guessed it – you! Not only do we often forget or put off taking care of ourselves, many of us are pros at talking especially harshly to ourselves. Many of my clients have an inner monologue that goes on a continuous loop. These thoughts include things like, “I can’t believe you missed that workout today – you are so lazy!” or “You have to stop eating like such a pig” or “You are a disgusting, fat person who has no self-control.”

Now, would any of us talk to our best friends the way we talk to ourselves? Of course not! Pretty soon, we wouldn’t have any more friends! Then why do we think it’s okay to talk this way to ourselves? Whenever a client tells me about her latest bout of self-hate talk, I ask her to think about what she would say to her best friend if the friend was saying these hateful things about herself. Common answers to the above hate talk include, “You’ve been so tired and run-down lately, it’s probably a good thing you skipped that workout. You need the rest!” and “You are not a pig! We all overeat sometimes, and it’s not the end of the world,” and “You are a beautiful, smart, and loving person – self control has nothing to do with how wonderful you are!”

Let’s break the cycle of negative self-talk and start talking to ourselves in a more positive way. When we are kind and gentle to ourselves, we are more likely to take better care of ourselves, too. Imagine what a difference that would make!